This is is just to proclaim that I'm alive and I'm back again.Myriad of thoughtless moments and an equal no of thought provoking flashes,is what I am sailing through.Just an average guy without a certified luck  trod along  the rainbows  to prove his point ,to himself n to others.Often it was not too difficult to prove him wrong,because in his heart he knew there is nothing to prove. Well a eternal optimist in him din't let him to slip into the abyss.He crawled back n started to walk,knowing that it won't be too long before his steps catch life again.It will be soulful one.I might not have of a company but I won't be alone.The realm of life doesn't cease in the visible...In ode to life.  Amen

Fast and deeper
sinks my heart
gaze extending
miles of lonely path

Dry and dusty my lips
trees half dead
green no more
I could see death

Shadow so dark
stronger than life
ready to stab back
no easy escape

Lovers mock death ... and reborn

Slow and steady
fostered inside
dreams unfulfilled
and wishes abound

Love eventually
never so green
so alive for you
moistened my soul

Gust of cold wave
kissed my sense
it's not the time
Clouds visit graves

Oh! Showers from heaven
drench my soul
subtle and intense
in the colours of love

Ground muddy and smooth,so real
and foot prints befriend
the pairs moulded in my spirit
with gaps of fingers filling

Uncanny and how mesmerizing
Are your eyes, sparkling!
How does one speak, a truth obvious
Is it sane, to bare a soul unknown?
In a mass to summon the shadow!


Asserts, the maverick in mask
Let the heart croon its musings
That he won't see you again
Written his fate, in the loner's love
Trailing a voyage, through the gale


In ode of your eyes, sparkling
And the crystals, from the far sky
Miraculous, under the jet black eyebrows
And lashes long, shadowing the glow
Never saw twinkling stars, so close



The voice, deep and mellow
Like the rhythm of light and shadow
Promises of a song, unsung
And smiles running the rainbow
Glittering in myriads of dayglo


Let me wish, in the quest of life
The dreams buried and pristine
Be realized and last to time
And the song of sparkling eyes
wont be a lie beneath the sky

                                Autumn leaf

I’m the autumn leaf
Soon to fall

To the ground, on the path

Once you crossed

When everything was green

 Now it’s autumn

So chill here, I don’t see you any more

I don’t sense the sweet air

Once you breathed here on the bench beneath,

Alone in the crowd, in this part of world

 Once I fall off this tree

A gust of  chill air will take me

To your door step

Open the door

If you hear me

 If you still feel the love

In my last call

Treasure me between the pages

Or just ignore ,to be forgotten in time,

To wait for the days to be shorter again 

The Lonely Duet




Standing at the Crossroad… for a sign
I heard you singing, distant some where
The song was not unknown

The one we had sung last

I tried to sing along

I took the lonely path, we’d once thought of taking

In search of the signs, you’d left

The duet was soulful…

Rustling of leaves had stopped

Perhaps birds were praising in silence

And the autumn was there so soon

Trees were off their glory

Birds were baring their souls

I was lost in the song

And it was not a duet anymore

Below the horizon, hopes sank with sun

The moon & the stars promised for a journey

But something was amiss midst of the long night

I wished to cry aloud… but I was not alone

And the tears were frozen, to flow in silence

Perhaps it was spring in the other world
Trees were green & blooming
Birds had found their love
And I was lonely… so hollow inside
But…I kept on singing, pretending the duet

I’ve lost all the signs, you’d left
And of the long stride, I came along
Its dark & I’m blue…without you

I’m not hearing you anymore
I’m still singing, pretending the duet

How can I pretend so long?
I complained to God, for an answer
I kneeled and prayed in silence… to hear
I heard you singing… closer than ever
He deceived me …& the unspokens to decipher again

Memory of entwined fingers
Hard to fade
Promise…to keep, till I go to my grave

Memory of entwined fingers
Filling the gap
Lingers…in my heart

Warmth of your touch
And the blush
Magical…indeed, I wonder

Dimples of your smile
Sweet smell of your presence
Angelic…in every sense

A Lover’s imagination
A reality, Angels envy of
Divine revelation…my heart told

My definition of eternity
Heavens deny me a place without
My world… So perfect with U.

Voice honeyed
And words unuttered
I Ponder…spawning a story, untold

But…

Memory of entwined fingers
Not an illusion
Wish … i could realize again

If not…

Let me dreams of entwined fingers
Destined to live this way forever
And promises…to keep, till I go to my grave

I wished upon a shooting star
To bring me the Angel,One I Luv
But  it died so young
 

 Perhaps it had a wish too
Flying across the lonely night 

On the way to find its Luv 

But couldn’t keep its hope alive
Perhaps it wished to burn itself
And  in agony...I was  cursed 

I will never wish upon a shooting star
That it may curse me again
That it may have a wish too

 

I don’t want to name, whatever it’s... 

Not that I am not sure of it, 

Not that m afraid of declaring, 

Bcoz  U won’t stop again to listen me.

 

I don’t know how  can I sing it 

Not that I forgot the Sonata, 

Not that I can’t fill in the words,
 Bcoz U may never ask me to sing it.

This is between two strangers, U n Me
Who met by chance (or Destiny),
The single day our eyes meet again,
U will see the true me n the trust, May u feel whatever it’s... 

When we meet, I wont dare to tell u again 
I won’t show my shining eyes n  tears to u,
I wont ask u  to hold ur hands for a while, 
I wont ask u ”Can we name whatever it’s... 

Thought of giving a name to LIFE
So here I name this N***
That, once an Angel crossed my path,
Bcoz without u I never wished to name it.

 

I wrote this for my Angel.Dnt knw if  ever she wl knw.

Its going to be my 2nd post.I ws not sure i could write so soon.

  Well , i must say m kinda confused nw.I confess m failed to the aspirations of my parents.But soon i can prove myself.I need the much needed desparation n aggression to do smthing
                 But wats the goal of my life?Its definitely not in the choosen field.A goal must give u the peace of mind.In the process i've to listen my heart.Thts wat i want.Wen ever we do smthing we r judged  n asked to be obliged.But this obligation stops us frm hearing the cry of  our soul.I really hate this word .Relationships dont get stronger  by obligations n compromises.These two things make bond manipulative n lifeless.Every couple says its  the compromise thats most needed in a relationship.So how does this help???U r in a bond bcoz of love,bcoz u feel u share the same soul.If smone compromises , thts become conditional.U change urself expecting the other to do the same next time.Ok this time i keep ur word n the nxt time u must oblige!!!This is how we  boast that we r in a strong bond.If m right thts  hypocrisy.U knw wat u feel but declare everybody that u r happy.U r not the same person ne more .Well it depends on individual perception,the feeling that give him solace,the amount of truelove one need may deviate.But it really need lots of courage to lie that ur happy.M the one who needs lotzzzz of love. Thats wat i believe.Wen i loved it ws unconditional.I never felt m compromising.If nething changed that due to of its own accord.M not idealizing my love.But its wat i felt.Its ws a long distance realationship. Still i must confess the journey couldn't last.Still m vry much in love with my Angel.I believe true love returns.m not regretting wat i did bcoz of her only i learned to love uncondtionally .I evolved as a person,as a friend n as a lover. Every person I love will thr be forever in my life.But m upset with her.Bcoz she still hv a part of my  soul  n without it i m feeling lost.m still unable to cope  but i must move to build myself.Hope her love wl grow in my heart. Smtimes i felt its merely a illusion.But its the illusion that transforms into reality,provided we really want it that way.So it depends , hw much perfection we want in the illusion,portray urself in it n make it real.After all we all hv our own world

M a kind of inspired one.So while blogging i may not sound original.But wl let my heart guide me.The title ws decided 5 yrs back.I want to visualize wht i can.

So, nw m depressed.I read smwhere Whn women gets depressed they go shopping n men invade another country.If deep inside in my heart,i want to escape every knwn one go n sm where,i cn discover myself.Its diff in reality.Thr r certain things i can't forget n dnt wnt too.Bcoz tht ws the most beautiful thing tht happened.My Angel.May be this is the 15 th time m listening Aab na jaa by Palash sen.M kinda Desprate nw.But nt hopeless.I wl always wait to realize my dream.Thr r hell lotz of things,i cant write.

So i ws readin tishahi.rediffiland.com/.so i decided to post finally.why?i dont knw.May be a compulsion to write smthing.Cant be more creative right nw.may get back later